Unemployment is never a rewarding status, but seeking jobs in France is one of the most frustrating activities one can undertake. Ask my friend Kepin:

-Did you hear anything back from that French who interviewed you last week?
-Since I didn't get any news, I called her today.
-She said that she preferred another guy over me and that this other candidate didn't call her. So, she wants to wait a couple of more days for his call and if he doesn't call, then I can call her again and she will tell me whether she hires me or not.

Can you imagine a sicker employer??? Basically, the French bastard prefers another candidate, but in order to meet the average level of arrogance of this country, instead of calling the successful candidate, they just tell him: "Call me back". If the preferred candidate doesn't call, they don't bother calling him... And meanwhile, Kepin waiting.

Another friend works as a secretary for some back office department in a French company. Now there's a vacancy with the top officer, somehow one level up the ladder, she applies. Gets an interview with the HR manager and when they meet, this French manager says: "Sorry, I have lost your CV (...) but really this job is not that great for you, more opportunities will come in the future". As my friend concluded: "They simply didn't give me the chance because this manager meets many external French customers and I am black".

I have been to her office several times and I have never seen another black person.

A third friend, Emily, was the typical French-wannabe, until she was fired by her French boss... She spent over 1 year in missery, since all her French network rejected her, until she got in touch with some English guys who helped her get a job with an English company.

Today I went to have lunch to some French corner café. In the UK, for a 50 tables restaurant, you would have 4 or 5 waiters... here you only have one. This one is so protected by the system that he can afford being slow, unfriendly, unhelpful, while some of his customers browse the job postings in the newspaper.

French job seekers, keep searching! This is your time to work hard towards one objective, the holidays will come later, once you have the job!

* * *
Finally, the daungeons of the far right are cellebrating. France has passed the most anti-immigrant law in Europe. Only non French who bow to French superiority and speak French like, say, Marechal Petain, will be allowed to stay in the country.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

France, the French? What a conundrum!

An observer.

12:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dutch papa,

I'm so REAL!!! However, the reasons you gave of why I probably feel welcome and accepted in France, more than describing France are clear symptoms of what is known as PARANOID PERSONALITY DISORDER!!!

Good luck Dutch papa, you seem to be a good individual but you are really going to need good luck with that way of thinking!!!!

Lovely Victoria

ps. Beware Evil might be watching you!!!

1:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sweet idiotic Victoria, I was right about you, Dutch Papa is not the person that sent you the e-mail you refer to it was me, you see you aren't even aware of your surroundings so how can you have a valid opinion of the French.?

Your comments about paranoid persnonality disorder were amusing and had it been anyone other than you who had made them I would have been offended. Because it was you they don't offend me. How could I be offended by the misguided coments of an imbecile?

Cheerio sweetie!!

2:14 PM  
Blogger Aly said...

Dear unknown (?),
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! You did it well. I'm amazed and I'm really enjoying the fact that I felt for your game. I didn't foresee it. Enjoy France...


9:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Uranus,

Really nice Post!!! Congratulations. I think that must of us that have the bad luck being working here in Paris cuz our companies have had a really bad experience... and well, the high unemploymet rate in this country is part of the game for this suckers: THEY DO NOT LIKE TO WORK!!! that simple.

1.- Frenchies do not have idea what productivity is
2.- Frenchies do not have clue what QUALITY processes are and how apply this to theri own work.
3.- Frenchies still thinking they are in XV century, and that another people have to do all work and then they will come and take it using unloyal tricks.
3.- They are lazzzzzzyyyy as hell.

Mr the list can be as huge as you want to do it, cuz in the labor field French from Paris just do not have the qualities and skill to perform important jobs...that's why they brough us!!! the foreigners!!! to keep their economy floating!! cuz these suckers do not have the minimmun idea how bad their economy is.
Here at the company, I have to deal every day with the stupidity of this assholes!!! However I have learned a bit how to play the game: FIRE as much Frenchies as I CAN and replace these bad and unproductive personel with skilled people, a bit difficult from inmigration side, but showing that I can not find skilled people in France for the possition (THE EASIEST THING IN THIS WORLD). The best ones I have now in my charge are germans and Spanish but no Frenchies Wannabies cuz they are stupids, I have 2 really good sales force frenchies that grew up in US so no FRENCH SHIT MENTALITY, they even recognize that they are more American that French and they love it. I still have to fire 6 Frenchies for this 2006 and before End Fiscal year of 2007. SO I think I will give this comming unemployed suckers the holidays they diserve so thet will continue doing what they do everyday: NOTHING and drink coffe!!!

Dear and lovely Victoria, I think I have goodluck, I can go to Amsterdam everyweekend in 4 hours and go back to normal and friendly life, so I do not think my DISORDERS are bigger that the ones Frenchies have, cuz they have such a CRAP of culture, even I have some Frenchies-Wannabies as friends I have told them this always, that their culture is just low than SHIT.

Uranus, keep posting.. really funny man.

Cheers, doei, bye, adios, ciao

Brighton Rules!!!!

9:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Quick hello from an airport.

Korea nearly finished the French football team yesterday, although the joy is not complete yet. We only have to wait one more match to get all those French back home.

The French cannot win even if they outsource the entire team to their immigrants.

The French were never good at team sports, but are they good at any soport at all?



7:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Something that appeared at the end of the previous blog topic. It will help to illustrate the patience, thoughtfulness and long term view taken by so many of the French (irony - for those who think I was being serious) Anyway onto the copy of the blog as promised.

Remy said:

A lot of usual british francophobia around here !
Let me tell you about my experience in London as a froggy : the day I began to work, everyone was observing me, looking for trace of my french complex of superiority. So when I refused to go get drunk in a pub with my colleagues on friday night, I officially became the haughty asshole of the office. And each time I didn't laugh to a joke (I must say not every briton is screamingly funny), my incurable frenchness (that is, to any briton, assholeness) was a bit more recognized. After a month, I was already thinking of coming back home.
I fortunately made friend with a indian guy who explained me the rules of english companionship and found a way to go beyond the national stereotype I had been reduced to. Finally I spent a great time in London and never miss an occasion to go there.
Back in France, I often hear countrymen pouring their crap about their experience in England : the English are unfriendly, scornful, they think they're the best, they have no savoir-vivre, blablabla.
Those poor french are like the people of this blog :
they didn't manage to go beyond the stereotypes they had and those they suffered from. Somehow they didn't make it in France, hence the resentful and rancorous comments read above. Poor lads !

11:27 AM
Anonymous said...


I think that you must be confusing us with some people that actually give a F..K

12:51 PM
Rémy said...

Un utilisateur anonyme :

Why would you make the effort of answering me if you actually didn't give a f..k ?

9:17 PM
Anonymous said...

Last word freak are you? Piss off Froggy!!!

12:04 AM
Anonymous said...

It's not personal Remy it's just that there are better things to occupy ones self with than the opinions of a Frenchman. Just observe your national history and your current political and economic malaise and you will see why your nation is now considered to be third world and not worthy of note. France is a ship of fools.

Bye old son

12:12 AM
rémy said...

I forgot to mention :

You stupid fucks !!!

5:52 PM
Anonymous said...

Exactly what I expected from a Frenchman. No debate, no arguments just abuse! It rather proves the point about the French, thanks Remy.

Bye old son

7:01 PM

See what I mean? Oh well!! Jean Paul Sartre once said "Hell is other people" He was French and he lived amongst the French. What can anyone possibly add to his statement about life in France?


8:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I always liked Jean Paul Sartre's style, but now that I live in Paris, guys, I admire that man!

How can you not question the bondness of the human soul when you are surrounded by some lies, so much nationalistic fanfare and cultural garbage?

Living in Paris makes many question the nature of human beings.


10:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What I would like to know is how France became the number one holiday destination for non-French holidaymakers?

I know that the variety of scenary, the weather, some would say the food but I prefer Italian cuisine, makes France a tempting place to holiday. Why is it that the people that come here year after year put up with the rudeness, indifference, sloppy and sometimes non-existent service? I can't understand it at all.

Perhaps someone can answer this question for me? I look forward to hearing some reasons why the French get away with their crap!


7:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


You are right, France is along with the US, Spain and Italy amongst the top 4 destinations for travellers. Now, don't be mislead by the statistics, because while a traveller who sleeps one night in Venice can be considered a tourist, you cannot assume that a traveller sleeping in Lyon is. Many travellers en route to Portugal, Spain, Italy, the UK, the Benelux, Germany or Switzerland have to stopover in France.

In other words, France (and Belgium too) have always benefited from its central geographic position in Europe.

Comparing the cultural heritage of France to, say, Itay is a joke.


1:32 AM  
Blogger francesca tereshkova said...

Yeah, this all rings a bell. Don't be too hard on the French though - we'd be the same if we'd been brought up here. Once you can work out how to scratch the surface (hard as diamonds I admit) they can turn out to be OK.

Having said that, living in France has irritated the hell out of me for the past 8 years, and I'm shortly heading back to Blighty (hurrah!)

Read more about my French experience on my blog http://goodbyelafrance.blogspot.com

Bon courage everyone!


12:14 PM  
Anonymous Trevor said...


I like your blog but have to get past the razor wire in order to comment. Do take it down (the razor wire I mean), am sure you'll have lots of guests.

7:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Francesca,

You may be right in your suggestions regarding getting to know the French but life is just too short to be bothered with the effort of getting to know a nation that does not actually like its self. So, like you I'm going back to the UK, can't wait, I return on the 8th July, Yessssssssssss!!!!

I will have a BIIIIIIIIG drink for you and your hubby.


9:25 PM  
Blogger francesca tereshkova said...

Yes, about 'life is too short', go to my blog to see my last post (razor wire now removed, thanks for pointing that out)

If all goes to plan we'll be heading back in August : )


9:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A superb analysis lifted from Francesca's blog:

How do I hate thee, let me count the ways...

Why it is so, so hard to like the French? Perhaps it's because they emit so little warmth. In general, you get the feeling that they are waiting patiently for you to leave their presence. People rarely smile. I'm a very smiley person, and sometimes feel I should warn the French of this by slapping a post-it note onto my forehead with 'Cart me off to the funny farm' scrawled on it.

They are as hard to like as spoilt children. If the planet Earth was a hotel, the French would occupy the whole of the top floor penthouse, and have use of a separate, executive lift. This is why I can't forgive them for looking so bloody miserable. Just looking at people's faces on a trip to the supermarket is a draining experience. Scowls, raised voices, random acts of selfishness and hysterical driving are part of everyday banality.

I hadn't realised how much this was getting to me until about two years ago when, after having steered the pushchair round yet another copious crotte de chien, I was imagining grabbing the dog owner by the scruff of his/her neck and plunging his/her entire face into it, and then rotating gently. My fantasy was interrupted by a plaintive little voice from up front. 'Mummy, what are you saying?' France was turning me into the mad old woman who talks to herself in the street.

Even worse, the French are no fun. No other country has so much potential for enjoyment concentrated within its borders, and yet, they still can't manage it. My last job featured a typically pampered French workforce. There was a budget set aside for enjoyment, in this case, the office Christmas dinner, held at a restaurant. The problem? The chosen restaurant was a two-stop metro ride away. My colleagues fell upon this anomaly as if Christmas had come early. An opportunity to moan! Gather round! 'Déjà, le fait de prendre le metro, ça désenchante, quoi,' drawled one. Yes, I am 'disenchanted' by the notion of taking a five-minute metro ride for a work knees-up.

I am in a position to compare France with another foreign country that I know very well - Russia. And here the plot thickens. Russians have far more obvious faults than the French. Their country is in chaos, filthy and riven with corruption. Scratch the surface of the average Russian and you usually find an inveterate rascist, homophobe and drunk. The men are mostly incapable of doing so much as making themselves a cup of tea (hubski thankfully is an exception: A Russian man who irons).

Yet as a people Russians are a delight - generous and larger-than-life with a reckless joie de vivre that I can't help but admire (even among some of hubski's harder drinking friends). I connect with them with an ease that leaves me scratching my head over the eel-like nature of my immediate neighbours.

It is possible for the French to grow on you. I know people who have devoted their entire adult lives to learning to like them. Some have succeeded, especially those who have married into French families (although there I could tell you a few stories) or bought a farmhouse. But a farmhouse is beyond my budget and I have been patronised by too many French men at work, and in banks, shops and government offices to ever contemplate sleeping with one, let alone marrying one.

So I've come to the conclusion that I wish to do other things with the rest of my life than learn to like the French.

I'm sure they'll get over it.

Thanks for that Francesca,


2:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If you want to read more of Francesca's balanced, Anglo-Saxon view of the French and life in France before she returns to the UK in August go to: http://goodbyelafrance.blogspot.com/

Great Brit blog.



2:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Quick hi from New York.

I promise I will visit Francesca's blog when I return to Paris tomorrow.



4:00 AM  
Anonymous Dutch Papa said...


Really nice blog. I am really Uranus Fan, but I will continue reading yours.


Mr T

12:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It couldn't be, not yet, the African French were not taken out of the World Cup by African Togo.

Sad news.

6:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

But wait a minute!! Check the half-time drinks of Togo!! They may have been doctored by a desperate France team manager!


1:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

England vs Ecuador.. England is still in the world cup thanks to a blind referee.. GO PORTUGAL!!!!!

4:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi from the Greek Islands, where I am enjoying a week away from the French and investing my time on productive activities such as sailing, sleeping siesta and watching football.

Uranus returns next week.

To those left in France: Courage!


1:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Je n'ai jamais lu autant de conneries rassemblées sur un seul blog ... Sérieusement : tire toi une balle !
Tu es vraiment un personnage trés triste ... Affligeant...

PS : L'euthanasie : pensez y !

2:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To the last blogger - the French tosser:

Est-ce que tu penses que nous donnons une merde au sujet de ce que tu penses froggy?

Bien cordialement.

8:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you'll find joie de vivre is a French term.
And there sure isn't a lot of joie de vivre going on here.
And worse displays of attitude than what the French are collectively being accused of. Not to mention grammar.
I've also lived in several countries, and I've found that every place has its good and bad points. If you're at a point where you're seeing nothing but the bad, you might want to think about going somewhere else.

11:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Quick hi from some Greek Island.

Someone said a few days ago that the French are the 'spoilt children' of Europe. I just met a few French idiots over here, they were complaining about the hotel, the food, etc. Why don't they remain in their damned country?



9:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I just met a few French idiots over here, they were complaining about the hotel, the food, etc. Why don't they remain in their damned country?"

All you do in this blog is petty complaints and railing about the people and culture. Why didn't you remain in YOUR damned country? You're so blinded by your prejudice that you can't see yourself in the hatred that you spew.

10:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

perhaps your friends was simply unqualified to move from secretary - to officer, afterall she may have no experience managing. the race card is the easiest card to pull anytime we don't get something we want.

the process is simple in many cases: no qualification, no interview.

10:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now. Keep it up!
And according to this article, I totally agree with your opinion, but only this time! :)

11:10 AM  

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