The French Cultural Dimension
I always dreamed of correcting Einstain's relativity formula, amending Darwin or writing a prologue for a new edition of the complete works of William Shakespeare. Thanks to Germany's 2006 World Cup, the time has come.
Reading some blog postings, some news articles and listening to both fine citizens and French populace, I have found a golden opportunity to enhance Hofstede's Cultural Dimensions. Basically, Geert Hofstede analysed cultural attitudes in a number of countries and concluded that there are 4 variables (or Dimensions) that define each culture: Relative interest in politics, masculinity, individulism and uncertainty avoidance. I just found a few more dimensions that would allow us to distinguish between French-wannabe cultures and the rest, these dimensions are:
1. Smell. The more you stink, the more likely you will buy a lot of parfums de Paris and the more you will enjoy France.
2. Nagging. Countries that love nagging are prone to enjoy French behaviour and arrogance with gusto.
2. Sympathy for headbutts. Some people just love watching the big guy giving headbutt to the smaller guy.
Today I returned to France and I was quite impressed to see to what extent violence is seen by French people as acceptable. I guess this explains a lot of things: Napoleonic invasions, invention of the Guillotine (yes, the greatest French invention to date), the occupation of African nations, the Vietnam war...
They like violence especially when the big guy goes after the small boy. French are like hooligangs cheering Goliath everytime he kicks David. However, they are always on the loser's side. But they lose and then they enjoy accusing David of unfair tactics.
With a much smaller budget, one year ago, on July 6th, London won over Paris the organisation of the 2012 Olympic Games. Congratulations!
But the French always find the way to celebrate defeat. Today I saw the Air Force planes rehearsing for the July 14th military parade, that kind of pro-Fascist remain of a past that didn't exist where the President salutes an Army that has never won any war in spite of its sheer budget. Yes, it was sent many times to attack small countries and loot their wealth, but when the attacked awoke the French Army ran away. Coming back to the football subject, this is why attacking is worthless if you don't have a strong defense (translation: Italy's strategy of building up a strong defense proved supperior to France's strategy of just kicking the ball and wait, and this is why Italy won a well deserved World Cup final match).
Wait for July 14th and the patriotic fanfare. They don't have anything to celebrate this year, but it doesn't matter, taxes for 2006 have already been collected. I already paid for the show.